Have you ever offended people by your speech or actions? Well, I don’t know about you, but I have done that many times and I am not proud of it. What do you do when you need to apologize?
Here is the 4 step process that I use which have benefited me tremendously when I need to apologise:
1. Realize and admit that you am wrong
Apologizing first has to start with you fully accepting that you are in the wrong. You will not be congruent in your apology when you refuse to see that its your fault. Restoration of relationships can only when someone admits their mistake.
2. Be sincere and specific about your mistake
Clearly list down what are the mistakes you are apologetic about and be sincere about it. Be very clear in why you need to apologize, what you are apologizing for and that you treasure your relationship more than your pride.
After you have said what you need to say, give a short pause to your apology. This will help the other person to process what you have said. If you keep talking, most people will not be able to remember the key words in your apology.
4. Ask what can you do to make things better
Lastly, ask the offended party what you can do right now to appease their anger. This helps to show that you are willing to make atonement for your mistakes.